June 2006 Archives
Only in Oklahoma. Okay, actually I guess this could have happened anywhere. Well, anywhere in America. So, I guess I should say "Only in America".
Looking at the picture of Mrs. Thompson, I'm sure she's thinking, "So... this is what he meant by 'worse' when the preacher said 'For bettter or for worse'".
Update: Apparenlty Judge Thompson has been convicted. And before you start pointing the finger, just realize: the only difference between him and you is that he got caught.
At some point, someone mentioned the user manual. This brought to mind an amusing technique for turning regular text into gibberish. I had suggested we do this for the user manual.
Here's how it works:
- Highlight and control-c to copy the bit of text you want to translate.
- Go to http://babel.altavista.com
- Paste the text into the little text window.
- Select "English to Japanese".
- It'll bring up a page with your page translated to Japanese. Highlight the Japanese.
- Go back to http://babel.altavista.com.
- Past the Japanese text into the same window, and select "Japanese to English".
- And you're done.
It accepted PR, therefore, Ozzie Guillen plays back the coach of white 硫 element chemical compound for the homosexual person, used alias for Chicago Sunday describing the ジェイ Mariotti reporter for time method.I have known those which are thought: "Alias? It seems to be wide like those 17 of the various levels of offensiveness. "I do not know. The everyone was "alias" with anything.
When the raw materials hit to the one thing, it is good, it decided that it is that time which that apologizes someone. And he apologizes. But, UM, as for me with those which are not thought being able to use the method of being everything which is desired rather.
In addition as for Guillen [ Sunday another sofa of グレッグ of the time columnist ] it had in the him and the cheerful friend, it attended and in the game of WNBA, and went to the Madonna concert you informed.What which UM is this him clear by mistake it is not the person who is thought.I should know. I give many from my share of apology, approve that: That me at the time of remourseful is very rare without either the powder れ. Time almost, I pulling my fat from the fire and pulling out it is the fair thing which is tried.
So I when really being regrettable someone that the way those where that sounds have known. So we may learn whatever kind of lesson from this? When me me it should have learned with anything from gaffes which is in accordance with word hard, there are times when apology simplicity it maintains of my exit, in culpa of mea, you tried. That and because of that concerning regrettable, and then being tightened, really, it is those which fail the fact that is calculate.
Renewal: Following to ticket, alias is used for showing the tobacco in England. So, we easy all sleep tonight is possible.
There's all kinds of fascinating information in the above story. I wouldn't even know where to start. Okay, how 'bout this one:
FUN FACT: [Lt. General] Augustus P. Longfellow hated identity cards. When he went to a bar, to prove his age, he would cut his torso in half and have the bartender count the rings. This was also useful for determining how much rain fell during each year of his life.Read the whole thing. It's long, but it's worth it. You'll laugh, you'll cry, and maybe you'll learn a bit about how relationships work.
Or at least how my brother thinks relationships work.
I know what you're thinking: "Which epithet? There are like seventeen of them, of widely varying levels of offensiveness." I don't know. Nobody's said anything but "epithet".
Well, when the stuff hit that one thing, someone decided it was time for him to apologize. And apologize he did. But, um, I don't think it worked quite the way they were all hoping.
Guillen also told [another Sun-Times columnist Greg Couch] that he has gay friends, attends WNBA games, and went to a Madonna concert.Um, clearly this is not a man who has any idea what he's done wrong.
I should know. I've given more than my share of apologies, and I'll admit it: it's very rare when I'm genuinely remourseful. Most of the time, I'm just trying to pull my fat out of the fire. So I know what it sounds like when someone isn't actually sorry.
So what lesson can we learn from this? Well, if I've learned anything from the dozens of verbal gaffes I've tried to mea culpa my way out of, it's to keep the apologies simple. Really figure out what you screwed up on, say you're sorry about that and only that, and then shut up.
Update: According to The Ticket the epithet is used in England to refer to a cigarette. So we can all sleep easy tonight.
"Grownup" is a somewhat elastic term. It could either mean people making babies or people blowing each other up or whatever. Or it could mean a movie that looked to be perfectly okay for kids to see, but if they were taken to see it, they'd be mutinous about 20 minutes into it.
It was this latter category of movie we decided to see. Specifically, The Prairie Home Companion.
Well, I wasn't mutinous, but I was dern near it. Good lord! That was hands down, the most boring movie I've ever seen by a freakin' mile. Jeez. That was five minutes of action stuffed into two and a half hours.
Here's how it worked: a fairly funny scene then Garrison Keillor singing folk songs for the next ten minutes, a decent joke, 10 more minutes of folk music, Meryl Streep emoting (poorly) in a really phony sounding upper-Midwest accent.
Dull, dull, dull. If you're under the age of 60 or you're unlobotomized, I suggest you avoid this movie at all costs.
Good reading.
The results seem to indicate -- suprise! -- that men and women approach fiction totally differently. Read the thing to find out how.
This name is so good, I can't even write it out on this, a family web site. In fact, now that I think about it, I probably shouldn't have posted that link. So please don't open it.
Anyway, if there's something I've learned from being on the other side of the CEO's desk, it's the importance of morale. So, if I end up running a business, I'll be sure to take inspiration from the British Rural Payments Agency. Because if this story is true, this group probably has the highest morale of any organization on the planet.
A whistleblower based at the agency's office in Newcastle made a series of allegations to the Evening Chronicle newspaper, claiming members of staff:I think my favorite is the break-dancing competition.
- Were caught on CCTV leaping naked from cabinets
- Vomited in cups and left them to fester in cupboards
- Took drugs and had sex in the toilets
- Swore and held fun-fights in the reception area
- Held break-dancing competitions during working hours.
I'd just like to know who the killjoy whistleblower was. Who would possibly blow the whistle and put a stop to that? Well, okay, I can think of dozens of prudes who might do that. But still.
Let it be noted, however odd commercials for American MTV are (or used to be, at least), they never had anything like this one.
Good Lord.
And get used to this look, since you'll all be seeing me sporting a version of it very soon.
For instance, do you know which is the drunkest state, no matter how you define it? The results might suprise you. They suprised me, although I'll admit I haven't spent much time there.
And do you know which is the most toothless state?. Okay, these results will probably not suprise you very much.
Fun stuff. Though not safe for work, if you were hoping to accomplish anything today.
Bad News: apparently she has gall bladder stones. The doctors would like to remove it. I'd imagine they do these things laproscopically these days, so it's no doubt not as big a deal as it would have been 15 years ago, but it's still major surgery.
Good News: it wasn't the Mexican food. So, she didn't spend three days in the hospital over enchiladas.
That's right. Someone out there has entrusted their son's spiritual upbringing to this guy right here. And by "someone out there", I'm referring to my older brother. And by "their son", I'm referring to my nephew Brody. And by "this guy", I mean myself.
Although, as St. Thomas Aquinas points out in the Summa,
if they are brought up among Catholic Christians, the godparents may well be excused from this responsibility, since it may be presumed that the children will be carefully instructed by their parents.Since both parents are on the correct team, I'm probably off the hook. But still. I'll keep my eyes out.
Although things weren't all great. For one, we drove down, which is never raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. I'd describe it as six hours of misery. Got done with it pretty quickly, though.
The food was great. Mexican on Friday night at tasty delicious Abuelo's. Barbeque on Saturday at Famous Dave's.
I had the St. Louis-style ribs. Why is it every barbeque place in America serves St. Louis style ribs, and yet I've never actually had ribs in St. Louis? Answer: because all the good places to have ribs in St. Louis are in pretty shoddy neighborhoods. Which basically means if you want to have good barbeque in St. Louis, you have to think ahead and go during the day. Like Saturday afternoon. Unless you like to live dangerously.
And of course, breakfast at the great Jimmy's Egg.
But not without a cost. Somewhere in the midst of all this eating, my mother came down with some kind of digestive malady and was hospitalized. In fact, she's still there right now, awaiting the results of the last test. At this point, they've got it narrowed down to two things: either A) a gall bladder infection or B) the Mexican food.
So, be sure to either pray for, think good thoughts about, or cast positive energy into the cosmos in the general direction of Judy.
