March 2006 Archives
The strategy for the Dems seems to have been "Offer no platform, criticize everything the Republicans have been doing, and hope their popularity collapses, thus electing us since we're the only other party to vote for."
The only problem with this strategy is that second part, the criticizing. The only people less popular than the Republicans these days are the Democrats. Going on T.V. and griping didn't seem to be helping much. What's worse, the only sticks the Democrats kept grabbing to bludgeon the administration had to do with foreign policy.
The war in Iraq (which I'm in no mood to defend) is not going well in the eyes of the American people. However, just because people don't like the way the current bunch are handling things doesn't mean they're just going to let any ol' bunch of lunatics take a swing at it.
And as for this domestic spying thing, the American people are enthustiastic supporters of it. They love wire-tapping, under the assumption (which isn't too bad an assumption, I might point out) that only other people's phones are getting tapped. The surest way to boost the president's approval ratings to the 70's would be to impeach the guy over it.
So, however gamely they were trying it, this campaign strategy had no chance of working, and if you were to put some of these strategerists in a quiet room and ask them totally off the record, they'd admit it. What they had to hope for was that somehow, the Republicans would fall apart on their own.
Well, this is it. This is the moment the Republicans actually start to show the strains in their coalition. And the issue is:
Immigration
This issue is going to absolutely explode. It's been simmering for a while now, but these protests over the weekend have really pushed this issue onto the front-burner. And when there are images like this one to accompany it, I suspect they aren't going to get the response the protestors were hoping for.
The big problem here is that while the American people are against illegal immigration, Republicans are wildly against illegal immigration. And the Republicans in congress (for reasons I'm still trying to figure out) have placed themselves way to the left of not only Republicans but the American people.
If there isn't some kind of action on illegal immigration (and by "action" I'm talking about something really draconian), the Republican base will be in open revolt well before November.
So, what should the Democrats do? Well, they're already doing two-thirds of what they should be doing, i.e. nothing and hoping for the best, respectively. They should go into total media blackout mode, no appearances by anyone. Nancy Pelosi, I'm looking in your direction.
But still. I wouldn't bet on them reclaiming either house of congress. Because, frankly, they just can't help themselves. They'll end up doing one of two things: A) go to go on T.V. and start calling everyone who opposes illegal immigration racist, or 2) get overconfident and do something utterly moronic like file articles of impeachment over the (as mentioned, enthusiastically supported) domestic wire-tapping.
This is all just the politics. As for my take on the issue itself, well, that's a story for another day.
By the time I'm writing this, I've gone through all the phases, like denial, anger, bargaining (don't ask how that one worked), and now I'm about onto acceptance.
I don't think you can argue that Indiana isn't a much better job. The IU basketball coach is the public face of the state of Indiana, much like the OU football coach is (to a large extent) the public face of the state of Oklahoma. Who knows who the governor of Indiana is? Well, I do, but never mind about that.
And that's another part of it. I'd imagine it gets pretty tiring introducing yourself as the OU basketball coach and people saying, "Wait, does OU have a basketball team, too?"
But never mind about any of that. I'll always have a fondness in my heart for Coach Sampson. He hit the scene my sophomore year, and really got me excited about basketball. With the exception of this year (for whatever reason), he always managed to wring every bit of talent out of his players and put out a team that's way more than the sum of its parts.
Well, I wish him the best, and hope he has success at Indiana.
You know, unless they play OU, in which case, I hope we beat them by 70 points.
And make sure you read the whole thing. Let me italicize for emphasis: the whole thing.
Pure genius, of sorts.
The ever-dubious Wikipedia (though they tend to be spot-on about things like this) defines this as "an attempt by fans of a work of fiction to explain or justify plot holes or continuity errors, often through convoluted contrivances".
For example:
In Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, Han Solo claims that his ship, the Millennium Falcon made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs, even though the parsec is a measure of distance (the distance at which one astronomical unit subtends one arcsecond of sky), not of time. Officially licensed books (considered "C" canon under Star Wars canon rules) have claimed this is because the space around Kessel contains so many black holes and other anomalies that a journey to and from the system involves very large round trips to avoid these dangers. More skillful pilots, however, are able to fly closer to the anomalies and therefore cut the journey short. Han Solo's claim of making the run in under "twelve parsecs", then, indicates his skill and the agility of his ship the Falcon.
I'm especially intrigued by the Sonic Alarm. As you all know, the 'Cub is the world's heaviest sleeper, and usually I have to march into his room with two very large skillets and bang them together for two or three minutes before he'll deign to open an eye and ask what I'm doing in there and would I please stop. (For once, I'm not exaggerating.) By that point, my ears are usually ringing and it seems like a lot of trouble.
The Sonic Alarm is basically a grenade with a ten second "fuse" that I can toss onto his bed. It doesn't turn off until someone replaces the pin. That sounds like a much better deal for everyone. And by "everyone", I of course mean "me".
If the curiosity is really getting to you, email me and I'll send you a copy.
Alopecia: baldness
Paruresis: Inhibited urination, especially in the presence of strangers, i.e. the shy kidneys
Now that I think about it, any time you give something a hefty Greek-derived name, it makes it sound worse. Although "poliosis" sounds like it could either be related to polio or scoliosis, neither of which sound like much fun.
Whole story here if you've been lucky enough to avoid it so far.
Seriously. I know what you're going to do. You're going to follow that link and be shocked -- shocked! -- at the contents therein. And then you're going to mail me, saying, "J, I followed that link you told me not to follow, and I was highly offended, Mister."
And I'll respond, "I told you not to follow it. And you did it anyway. Why are you getting mad at me?"
And you'll say, "Well, if you didn't want anyone to look at it, then why did you post the link?"
And I'll have no answer. Let's spare us all the awkward silence when you've painted me into a rhetorical corner and just don't follow this link.
The excuse for my visit was to help Ben move stuff. And once that was done, attend the housewarming party. It was good times. I got to see Mr. Sanders, which is always a pleasure, however hung over he might be. And we managed not only to get Catfish out of the house, but keep him out of the house for a whole nine hours. This shattered the previous record by about eight hours. Usually he does his classic Catfish drive-by: show up, say as little as possible to as few people as possible, and leave without saying "goodbye" to anyone.
The highlight of the party was an absolutely epic game of jenga. Yes, I said epic. I predicted at the begining that I'd lose the game, and I was right. What I had no idea was that the four of us would end up playing for about 45 minutes. I had a pounding headache after it was done from all the stress. The piece I pulled out was literally one of three avaiable pieces. Unbelievable.
Catfish was in top form all weekend. And he gave a bit of advice that does me absolutely no good, but it might be useful to someone:
The secret to successful drug usage is to always keep this phrase in mind: "I'm on drugs".
For example, the unsuccessful drug user, after taking three hits of acid, looks over and sees the walls melting, and says, "Good God! The walls are melting! This would be an excellent time to start freaking out!". The successful drug user says, "Wow! The walls appear to be melting. Isn't that interesting? Of course, the walls aren't actually melting, they just look that way to me, because I'm on drugs."
Seems simple, but it's not.
He also mentioned a neat trick to turn cheap vodka into expensive vodka: Get a big jug of the cheap stuff and run in through a Brita pitcher. He'd never tried it and I'm off the sauce myself, but that's probably worthwhile information to someone.
Yeah, fat lot of good those did me, but hey.
Anyway, I'm back home now. St. Louis is my goldilocks town. When I go to Oklahoma City, I think that that place is too small. And when I go to Dallas, I think that that place is too big. This place is just about right.
Check out this plot synopsis:
Capote Murder turns deadly in this pulse-pounding thriller set in the Kansas heartland in the year 3409. Truman Capote, a bounty hunter, is tasked to solve a series of gruesome killings, each bloodier than the last. But in order to catch a madman... he must become one. Or, alternatively, look for clues!I might have to check that one out. That sounds exciting.
Check them out here and also here.
As for my predictions, well, put me in that 96% as well. So, let's say... best actor is, uh, Tim Meadows, best actress is, um, that one who did that movie where she got naked, and the best picture is Flashdance. And best makeup for Boogie Nights.
The last few years, I'd given up watermelon, which everyone said was pretty lame, and everyone was right. This year is much tougher. I'm giving up eating out.
Jeez, not that kind of eating out. You people disgust me. Get your heads out of the gutter!
No, I'm talking about the restaurant kind. Granted, I'm tossing in a few exceptions. Like on Fridays, I'm allowing the eating lunch at Indian buffet, since they're really good with the non-meat-having dishes, and I haven't gotten the cooking of fish and vegetables and what not quite worked out yet. And this weekend, I'm going to Texas, where I won't have a kitchen to prepare stuff in. And if someone else pays, I'll allow that.
Still, it's a big sacrifice. I've been eating at home a lot more lately, but there are some days when I don't have any leftovers and the idea of going to the Hoosier grocery store around the corner and cooking sounds downright miserable.
But not nearly as miserable as getting crucified. I hear that's a real pain.
If and who you blame for bad events matters too. In one study, "[V]ictims of severe accidents who blamed themselves for the accident were coping more successfully eight to twelve months afterward than those who did not, and... victims who blamed other people (as opposed to some nonspecific external cause) displayed especially low coping scores." This rings so true to me that my head is still spinning. Have I ever felt unhappy for long about something without blaming another person? I'm drawing a blank.
